If Interview Includes Lunch, Don't Order Chicken Wings

Reprinted from our newsletter: by Amy Lindgren from The Charlotte Observer on September 5, 2000.

The good news: Your interview is going so well the managers have invited you out to lunch.

The bad news: Your interview is going so well the managers have invited you out to lunch.

Now, instead- of just worrying about your outfit, your eye contact, your answers, your handshake and your hair, you can also fret over that most haunting of internal questions: "I wonder if there's spinach in my teeth?"

Lunch interviews can be awkward for many reasons, but the source of discomfort generally falls into these three categories: food, conversation and paying the bill. Here are some tips to help you avoid the most common mistakes.

Food. For starters, try to drink from your own water glass. Don't laugh: It's amazing how few people seem to know that the water glass at the tip of your knife is yours, while the butter dish to the left of your plate is the one to use.

Take some time soon to learn the basics of the place setting and you will avoid many of the most basic errors. A good resource to check out would be any business etiquette book that includes a section on dining. I rely on Elizabeth Craig's 1996 edition of "Don't Slurp Your Soup" (Brighton Publications).

When it's time to order, I suggest very simple dishes, such as ground sirloin or the meatloaf special. These may not be your favorite foods, but you'll love the

way your fork and knife glide through them.

Meals to avoid include pasta, any kind of finger food, soup or salad. If you hesitate to remove salads from the list, stop to think about it: Do you really want to talk with your boss-to-be over a pile of 6-inch-long leaves served in a giant corn chip bowl?

Overordering is another common mistake. Since you'll be doing a lot of the talking, you don't need the added pressure of seeing a giant meal in front of you. As Craig points out in her book, the more you order, the faster you'll eat, and the greater the chance you'll start talking with food in your mouth. Yuk.

(And don't request a doggie bag. You will not look frugal; you'll look frumpy. Order small and avoid this complication altogether.)

The lunch buffet presents its own challenges. When possible, stick to your plan to order a simple meal off the menu. But if everyone in the group is going to the buffet, you should, too.

Once there, choose your food carefully and don't overload the plate. Favor easy-to-eat items, such as mashed potatoes or macaroni salad, and leave the big-pitted olives and chicken wings for another day.

And for heaven's sake, don't go back for seconds. Remember: This meeting isn't about eating; it's part of an interview.

Conversation. The conversation can be the most challenging part of the lunch interview. That's because you are in a pseudo-social situation with people you don't really know. Worse, you want to impress them but don't have control over the conversation. How do you know when to end the chitchat and start talking about your accomplishments?

Well, you don't. And you shouldn't be talking about your accomplishments. Since you were invited to lunch, you are the guest, which means the host controls things like the topics of conversation. So, if it looks as if the whole hour is going to be spent discussing golf, relax and go along with it. For all you know, your ability to participate in an awkward social situation is what the interview is really about.

Paying the bill. A good rule of thumb is that whoever did the inviting does the paying. To be safe, if you are in a group of people at your peer level, offer to pay for your meal or to leave the tip. But if the others are all potential supervisors to you, the meal is on them.

on the way back to the office, resist the temptation to light up a cigarette or pick at your teeth. YOU are still in an interview! Instead, ask about the next step in the interview process, thank your hosts for the meal and express your deep interest in talking with them further about the position.

When you return home, immediately send a thank-you letter. And then make a sandwich to compensate for the meal you didn't really eat. You've earned it.

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